ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
