Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
