tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
