Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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