Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
