your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
