I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
