what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
