Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
