How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize