Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize