Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
