redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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