Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
