Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
