it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
