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Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
that's an acceptable place to lick
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
