Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
