i jhust puked up my retainher.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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