cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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