You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
