ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
