Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
