Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
