I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
