It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
We're too hungover to prance.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
