Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
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