Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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