Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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