Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Randomize