I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
