nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize
