I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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