next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
