I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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