1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
