Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Fuck appropriateness.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
