Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
