nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
