ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I lost the right to judge tonight
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
