Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
