Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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