I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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