apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
