Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
