seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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