we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
