You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
