Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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