So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
